If you looked...

Blazer and Shirt- Vintage 

(For sale, $25 and $15...email me if you want them)

If you looked into my home, you'd see a cozy place full of love. And a hairless dog. 

You'd see re-done furniture from Craigslist, a chevron rug that I can never keep clean,

and a huge wall full of pictures of Mike and I.

A broken dishwasher might catch your eye, and a pile of dirty clothes

in the bedroom would let you know that we've had the flu for 3 days.

If you looked into my office, you'd see where I spend the majority of my time.

 You'd see two really large maps; one of them you can scratch off the places that you've been.

You'd see a stack of student scholarship applications on my desk,

and if you read them all,

you'd know why my heart aches for these kids,

and why I hate that I have to choose only a few of them to give money to.

You'd see a large box full of shine shirts, and beads scattered in every crack of the room, 

and a desk full of student pictures and shine signs 

You'd see two porcelain  statues of Christ, on either side of my computer. 

If you looked into my gmail, you'd see hundreds of emails from the sweetest people

that you didn't even know could exist. 

Your faith in humanity and their motives would be redeemed,

and you'd wish that you could meet every single one of them in person.

You'd jump up and down as you saw new projects that are coming in February,

and if I was lucky, you'd want to help.

If you looked into my phone, you'd find messages and calls from the people I love most.

You'd see embarrassing pictures that my sister takes of me,

and that we love to face chat before bed.

You'd gush about the flirtatious texts Mike sends,

and wonder if I think it's normal that I talk to my mom at least 5 times a day.

You'd find that a lot of my friends live outside of Arizona,

and that I love to have little girls nights with the ones who don't.

If you looked into my head, you'd think I was crazy.

You'd be sure that no normal person could have as many ideas at one time like I do.

You'd see a lot of logical choices being tossed around,

and wonder why I don't listen to anything logical at all.

But it all would make sense, because then

You'd look into my heart.

And you'd see that any fear I have, is outweighed by what I feel is right.

You'd see compassion, and you'd know that what I put my time into

really really really becomes who I am.

You'd wonder if it was healthy to be so wrapped up in other people's emotions,

and I'd say I don't know.

But that I couldn't imagine living any other way.

And you'd see that I mean it every time that I say,

I am happy.